Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness

Jen — Mon, 09 Oct 2017 03:18:18 +0000

[vc_row row_type=”row” use_row_as_full_screen_section=”no” type=”full_width” text_align=”left” box_shadow_on_row=”no”][vc_column][vc_column_text]October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month declared by President Ronald Reagan in 1988. Having a month devoted to pregnancy and infant loss, gives us an opportunity to look at some of the issues facing women and families that have lost a child.

Pregnancy is often a celebrated event with pink and blue…. everything! People share their pregnancy by telling family and friends, post social media status updates, or pictures of the pregnancy progressing with baby bump or ultrasound pictures.

But, a pregnancy does not always go as planned.

Pregnancy loss comes in various forms, whether it is a miscarriage, stillbirth, or abortion.

According to the American Pregnancy Association, 10-25% of all clinically recognized pregnancies end in miscarriage.
In an editorial article written by Spencer Morrison, approximately 1 out of 7 women had an abortion from the years of 1970-2016.
According to the Centers for Disease Control, stillbirths occur in about 1% of pregnancies or approximately 24,000 pregnancies per year.

Pregnancy loss is fairly common, yet it a subject that our society does not talk about. Since it is a taboo subject, extended family and friends do not bring up the topic, which leads to a feeling of low support for the immediate family.

Awareness months, days, events, help to bridge the gap for us to bring up topics. Here is a suggestion for friends and family if they are not sure what to do or say:

Be present. Hold space. Often times, the grieving person does not necessarily need for you to say anything. Just to be present in the room is presences enough.
Know that bringing up the baby would not be “remind them of their child” because the family is always aware of the loss. Your friend that lost the baby has not “forgotten” about the baby, and would love to have someone that is willing to talk about the loss.
A rollercoaster of emotions is likely to occur. Assure them that what they feel is a natural reaction to the situation. There will be triggering events such as the original due date or the one-year date of the loss. Items that were already purchased or having to take down the nursery can be triggering, so ask if you can help with these tasks. If they decline, respect their decision.
Remember that you may have to grieve as well. When a baby dies, this is out of the natural order, and you may need to attend to your own grief. You cannot give from an empty vessel. Talk to your own support system about how you are feeling.

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[vc_row row_type=”row” use_row_as_full_screen_section=”no” type=”full_width” text_align=”left” box_shadow_on_row=”no”][vc_column][vc_column_text]You can find the original written article by clicking here dated May 28, 2015.

Respect, by definition, is when we have admiration for someone or something that results from their abilities, qualities or achievements. People will have various definitions of respect, and how they define it may help us understand what respect means for them.

In regards to relationships, the best way to gain respect is to give respect. When people feel valued and loved, they are more able to return these feelings, which can build a mutual respect within the relationship. If one does not give respect, they cannot expect to be given respect and will likely be met with resistance. When explaining respect, I give an anecdote about dirty socks. If I leave dirty socks on the floor, it doesn’t really bother me, but I know it really irritates my partner. Then, we fight over it. Most people would think that this fight is over the fact that there are dirty socks, but the underlying problem is the feeling of disrespect.Another important aspect of respect is self-respect. One of my favorite memes right now reads, “Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.” This means putting your needs above others, and learning to say no when others want you to say yes. And being unapologetically YOU! You are the one that has to live your life and others are given the same opportunity with theirs. Allowing someone else to run your life is not a positive way to respect yourself. Keep in mind, when you start implementing your self-respect boundaries, you will likely be met with resistance. But go on, flex your self-respect muscle, because the more you use it, the easier it will be to continue. What is your definition of respect?

Prime Life Counseling

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness

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